Thursday, May 8, 2008

The real problem with Mormons.

I grew up Mormon.

The real problem with growing up Mormon is that you're surrounded by bizzarely beautiful people. Not a problem of mine. The bizarrely beautiful bit. Talk about giving someone a complex! Those Romney boys? Only average looking in Mormondom.

Mormon men and women are pretty much entirely clueless as all their peers suffer from the same disability.



For all us girls who are pretty on the inside. Hole, 1990. Warning warning warning -- Can both see and hear Courtney Love. Do not watch while operating heavy machinery. Please return all tray tables and seatbacks to their upright and locked positions. Discontinue watching if rash, redness, or swelling appears. Views expressed are those of the singer and do not necessarily represent other life forms.

4 comments:

Gritty Pretty said...

hey genie,
would i be prettier to you if i renewed my faith? heehee. i kinda equate what you're saying to my observations on foreigners. for instance, the ugliest lout from europe has always been outrageously gorgeous to me. maybe mormons have always seemed like the "other" to you from the very beginning. you precocious babe you.

Gritty Pretty said...

hey genie-james told me about your blog. i've now read the entire thing (mostly yesterday) and i thank you for writing it. You entertain me. gracias.
xo,quel

Mossie said...

I suspect it's the inbreeding in old-time Mormon families. Or the soma in the sacrament, maybe. And lest anyone takes offense, I AM an inbred former Mormon.

I became less attractive when I turned 10 and realized that being a Merrie Miss just wasn't nearly as cool as being a Blazer, and that all that rigid gender role stuff was utter bullshit.

Aww, shucks.

djinn said...

Yeah, I was ten, too. (Well, 10 1/2) At least I should have waited until I hit puberty.