Your defect is a propensity to hate everybody

The inadvertently untrustworthy narrator is one of the joys of fiction. Who can forget Mr. Collins in Pride and Prejudice who holds such a high opinion of himself:

"My dear Miss Elizabeth, I have the highest opinion in the world of your excellent judgment in all matters within the scope of your understanding." Dear reader feels slightly different. Dear readers, a host  of Mr./Mrs. Collinses! (Hostess, acually; as proper ladies I'm sure they would insist on the gendered form.)  Here is a sample:

"I hope she forgives me my judgment. It comes from a place of love.”

I think I'm going to adopt that as my new meme. Even though it has this slight hint of the off-color; like that time we heard, from a nearby campfire, someone singing "Jesus, come unto me."

(Judgmental--but only because she comes from a place of love--lady to the left.  On edit, this isn't really fair to Emily, over there.  She isn't cruel, she's just a bit inept.)

Of course I have my own bizarre list of reasons to look down on others.  Groups I feel free to mock:  those that wear polo shirts unironically, those that listen to Herbie Hancock (sorry, George); those unenlightened souls that don't realize the color orange is a neutral; heretics--heretics, I say--that use salted butter.  The list could go on. But my mockery should be forgiven, as it comes from a place of love, the place might even be a McMansion, even.

Prop. 8 trial funnies!

I need a bit of a setup here.

David Boies is a lawyer on the side trying to get Proposition 8--the anti gay marriage CA. initiative--overturned, which would then allow the resumption of same-sex marriage in California.

Prof. Miller is an expert for the defense--those attempting to show that Prop. 8 should stand.

A bit of cross-examination from today:

Boies: Are you aware of any official discrimination against gays and lesbians in this country today other than DADT policy?
Miller: (Thinking) I’m trying to think of other laws that are official…policies that discriminate on that basis. One thing you are looking at would be DOMA policy.
Boies: There you go!

The expert for the no gay marriage people (Pro-8 side) just admitted in open court that DOMA (the Defense of Marriage Act, which allows states to deny benefits to married same-sex couples) and DADT (Don't ask don't tell--the law that allows the Military to toss out gay people if the military finds out they are gay) are discriminatory.

Also this doozy:

Boies: Let’s go back to your article, heading Violating Democratic Norms, first sentence: The actual operation of the intitiative process actually violates a number of democratic norms in America" What were the norms you were referring to?
Miller: (reading) Trying to get the context here.
Boies: Okay
Miller: Norms in the above grafs
Boies: Openness, accountability, fairrness?
Miller: yes

The Yes on 8 side just admitted that the initiative process (Yes on 8 was a CA. initiative) is undemocratic in that it violates the norms of "openness, acccountability and fairness."

Boies: Don’t people in political science know what they mean by discrimination?
Miller: Well some is permissable and some is impermissable.
Boies: So is Prop 8 discriminatory.
Miller: It makes a distinction between two types of couples
Boies: Wasn’t that the definition of discrimination?
Miller: Well it might be.

\

Prop. 8 itself is discriminatory, according to the side that is all for Proposition 8.

What is the pro Prop.8 side's point? "We get to discriminate. Yeah. Because." Nice argument.

Thanks to Firedoglake for the liveblogging.

Where Food Goes to Die

Trying to find another cranny in my freezer after Thanksgiving this year, I realized (or rather, I stopped being in denial) that the leftovers and food we do not get around to eating before the 'use-or-freeze-by-this-date' and that we then shove into the freezer never seem to get used. Instead they wither away slowly as the moisture sublimes out of them and they develop third degree freezer burns. Meanwhile, I rarely buy food such as frozen veggies because I know that there is no room at home. Our freezer is no longer a place to store things we are planning on consuming. It has become a place where food goes to die.

I cannot provide you with pictures because my camera needs a new battery, and hey, some things are too gruesome, even for the internet.

But that changes today!!! I am doing a major purge of the freezer. Already I have found three ice-packs for injuries (wow, something to keep!) buried behind wads of inadvertently freeze-dried fish and some fresh(?!?) cranberries-----from last year!

It feels great to get rid of all that drek. But I do feel guilty for the food that did get wasted-----I suppose that is what kept me from throwing it out sooner. But now I am promising myself to be better. From now on I will only let myself use one shelf for leftovers and the like.

Looks like it's time for me to go buy some frozen spinach!

When You're Bored In Your Cubicle......

I came across this at The Daily Dish.

Such control!
This reminds me a little bit of what I did to enjoy swing music when recovering from an ankle injury. Except he's much better at it....

I'm glad to see that he posted this on u-tube rather than subjecting people on elevators and public transportation to his antics.

Yay, We're......... Above The Median!!!

A friend of mine had this posted on Facebook, so I put it here for more people to enjoy. So enjoy it already.

The Most Expensive Tomatoes-------EVER!

This Summer I wanted to have lots of Brandywine tomatoes, an heirloom variety with few seeds and lots of flavor. They tend to be irregularly shaped and are prone to splitting, and hence rotting. The ones at the grocery store always seemed overripe as did the ones at the farmer's market. I decided I would grow my own.

I bought eight large plastic pots(8 @ $8.49), eight supports (8 @ $2.29 ?), $20.00 worth of good quality potting soil, and then about $10.00 for some young healthy plants, some Brandywine, and one yellow-pear cherry tomato plant and one grape cherry tomato plant.


For a while everything grew really well, and then the deer discovered them. I had not sprayed the plants with anything because I did not want that putrid stuff on our tomatoes. I thought perhaps that I had them close enough to the house and that, furthermore, tomato leaves are supposed to be poisonous, so maybe the deer would not be fans.


The deer ripped one plant completely out of the soil, and bit several of the others back severely. I moved the least damaged ones to different spots on the deck where I hoped they would be safe although they would get a lot less light. The deer even pursued them onto our deck! Fortunately we have an upper level on our deck ( with even less sunlight) and although it is a little crowded with our table and chairs, I made room for the least ravaged of the plants.

The plants took a long time to recover from the setbacks and are just now beginning to offer a few fruits. It appears that I will harvest a grand total of two Brandywine tomatoes, and a few handfuls of cherry tomatoes. What you see in the picture at the top is my largest haul so far. I picked about seven cherry tomatoes five days ago. At least it looks like there are a few more on the way. And of course I am waiting for those two Brandywines to ripen.

It reminds me of the old joke about the two fishing buddies. After a disappointing haul of only one fish on their vacation, they tally up their expenses, cabin rental, boat rental, fishing tackle and bait only to discover that the one fish they caught cost 14 hundred dollars. "It's a good thing we didn't catch anymore!"

Lobster Debacles

I just saw the movie Julie and Julia this weekend, and watching Julie agonize over steaming the live lobster reminded me of a disastrous experience I once had with a lobster. I had decided to try a recipe where you broil it, but to do this you must kill it first.

I read instructions directing me to insert a knife into the head between the eyes to kill it quickly. I steeled myself and stabbed accordingly. The lobster went limp, so I flipped it over and started to slice the tail lengthwise. Just as I inserted the knife into the tail, the tail curled up vigorously and rhythmically. This was no mere twitching. That tail fought hard to escape. And it startled the heck out of me because I thought I had already succeeded in killing it, and there it was writhing and flapping about like the creature in the horror movie 'The Tingler'.



I felt horrible that I had not managed to dispatch the poor thing with a minimum of suffering. But it turns out I am not alone in having trouble killing lobsters swiftly. A quick scan of u-tube entries shows that in most cases, the lobster keeps moving significantly after the "fatal" blow. I suppose the 'nerve center' (a few paired ganglia) of a lobster is quite miniscule, so it is easy to miss. Also, since their nervous systems are so simple, they seem to keep functioning even after taking major damage. They are arthropods after all; just think how insects can keep moving after dismemberment.

There is disagreement in the scientific community over whether or not lobsters experience pain. None of their nerve cells appear to be 'pain receptors', but at the very least, the nerves in the tail I tangled with were saying, "Get me out of here!"

Oops!

Last Summer I got a new digital camera with more capabilities than I will ever understand how to use. (Why do they make the print in the instruction manuals so tiny?) Anyway, once while I was out photographing flowers in my garden I inadvertently pushed a button or something that made it start making a video. I stopped it within about a second and half, just long enough to record myself saying,"Oops!"

I never looked at the video until today! It turns out the initial frame looks kind of interesting because of how fast I was moving the camera at the time. Of course the video itself is too short to be interesting itself, but I kind of like that first frame! I wish I could paint like that!

Just Looking

Recently I was able to find a few items on E-Bay that have sentimental value for me because they replace items that I grew up with that did not survive my parents' impulse to sell almost everything, every time we moved. Even though they are most assuredly not the very things we sold, I am glad to have these pieces of my past restored.

Although I also saw that lots of people try to sell all sorts of crud (other people's treasured mementos?) I discovered that it can also be an interesting museum----as long as you promise yourself not to buy anything! I love seeing some of the wonderful old things that people have made all without the fuss of finding a parking space or standing in line to pay for admittance. And it's open 24-7!

Check out some of these items.

This wonderful penguin is a heavy doorstop.


This silver topped cranberry glass perfume vial is about 3 inches tall. Surprisingly, gold is the addition to glass that makes it that luscious deep pink color.

This item is called an epergne, or a table centerpiece, and it stands 16" tall. It is made of 'vaseline' glass which means it is made with uranium and is slightly radioactive. Check out what it looks like under a black light! (It also has some cranberry glass at the edge.)


But of course you do run across a lot of dubious kitsch like this vase in the shape of a pig's head. Don't let your preconceptions fool you however! Turns out this little porker is rare----or so they say. I'll continue to follow the conventional wisdom of avoiding rare pork. How about you?

So, enjoy looking. Just try not to spend too much!

Grammar Nazi's

I found this clip at a site devoted to grammar.


In spite of their professed enthusiasm for grammar, they entitled their post, "Who do you think you are kidding, Mr. Hitler?"




Ahem,....the correct pronoun would have been 'whom'. This mistake is not nearly as egregious as the improper use of 'whom' when 'who' is called for. I often let this sort of error go by, but at a site dedicated to proper usage? ( I took this screen print of that page just in case they correct it after they see my comment on their blog------I'm so petty).

Video Response to Charo Post

When I heard Charo's strong accent while singing in English, the first thought that ran through my head was "Ken Lee". For those of you who don't follow Bulgarian Idol----that's right, the Bulgarian version of American Idol-----this is part of what you have missed. You should really watch up through at least t=50 or so; you don't want to miss "tulibu dibu douchoo". By the way what do you make of the uncanny resemblance of the adjudicating panel to their American counterparts?

The singer did not make it through to the next round, but was invited back to sing on the season closer, and she has become famous throughout Bulgaria.

The various 'Idol' franchises round the world, from Bulgaria to Malaysia have proved that no country has a monopoly on amazing talent or inconceivable self-delusion.

Charo says "Happy Valentines," sorta

Love (fringe, bongos, more fringe, and a few extra bongos) will keep us together.



Now you know the secret. Pu-pu-di-do.

OOPS on 'ORP'

I revealed utter ignorance in a comment thread where I discussed 'ORP', the notion that "ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny"( the idea that embryological and fetal development summarize the evolutionary history of an organism). I goofed when I assumed that the first proponents of such an idea were modest in their claims.

Interestingly enough, French embryologist Serres and his cohort, German anatomist Meckel noticed a link between developmental stages and a "pattern of unification" in the organic world before 1830------before Darwin had come out with his Origin of Species(1859). ( Many scientists of the time already recognized that evolution had occurred; Darwin's main contribution was to identify natural selection as the prime mover in the process.) Serres and Meckel do not appear to have over-claimed anything, and many other scientists of the time embraced their thinking.

Enter Ernst Haeckel who in 1866 proposed the actual 'ORP' phraseology. Haeckel rather misrepresented the relationship suggesting that during development 'adult' forms of ancestral phyla were exhibited. His work included drawings that were over-stylized to enhance his theory, and his idea became associated with Lamarck's ill-fated theory. Because Haeckel was the first to declare "ontogeny re......" the idea was swept into the dustbin even though many reputable scientists continue to believe that Serres was onto something.

Although Haeckel's version of the theory has been discredited, it is interesting to note that as soon as I typed "ontogeny" into the search bar,".....recapitulates phylogeny" was the very first thing to pop up. When I typed in "Darwin", "darwin awards" was the first result. So much for survival of the fittest!

(The pic above is a painting by Haeckel, an accomplished painter-----a useful skill for naturalists. To give Haeckel his props, in addition to the phrase he remains famous for (ORP), he also coined the terms ecology and Darwinism.)

Gettin Her Grove On!

I'm in good company......

Someone Kinda Beat Me To It

Wizmark, the talking urinal cake!

I was considering different monuments for the Bush-Cheney years. First I considered a giant spittoon. As I became angrier a urinal seemed more satisfying, but that would make it hard for women to participate, and besides there is already an iconic urinal in Western culture. (Duchamp's urinal artwork has been called the most influential piece of modern art to date.)

And that's when it hit me, it should be a gigantic urinal cake! It just seems so emblematic of the GOP's efforts to mask their corruption and greed (Stinkiness) with phony, over-the-top protestations of Christian faith (cloyingly sweet, overpowering urinal cake stench).

The best part is that it would completely disappear over time, and we wouldn't be left with any monument to them at all!

Only one word stands between us and this perfect monument: NIMBY!

Is Djinn Spiralling Out Of Control In Her Obsession With Palin?

No!

A good number of those palicentric posts were submitted by Kerfuffler, a new-to-the-blogosphere friend of Djinn's from way back. I, Kerfuffler, do hereby apologize for the obsessive (incessant?) posting on this most painful of topics, but I really needed to practice from one day to the next posting things just to get a hang of linking, embedding, and what not.( And Palin kept supplying so much material!) You see, I am my family's resident techno-phobe. Until quite recently, merely sending an e-mail was a source of jaw-clenching tension for me. So, yay me!

I have posted other items as well. (Fruitfly foolishness, Western Spaghetti, inflatable street art, those evolving-painting videos and a bunch of other stuff.) I started on Sept. 30th. I guess Djinn and I have similar styles and interests, so many of you did not notice. I did not mean to be an impostor! In any event, I'm pleased to make your virtual acquaintance.

By the way, the image above is a FANTASTIC OPTICAL ILLUSION, but to get the full effect, you need to enlarge the image, and I might add, the bigger, the better! (Just hit Ctrl+ a few times and let the dizzying swirling begin.) Djinn, I know you like optical illusions, but you just might want to avoid this one!

An inadvertent 50th birthday present

Yeah, I'm turning Five-oh. Monday.

Last night GeeBee and I went to the Crystal Ballroom for a Ray Davies solo acoustic seated show. For those of you not in the know, Ray Davies is the singer/songwriter/driving genius behind the Kinks. For those of you that can't read my mind, I think that Ray Davies is one of the finest songwriters of the last half of the 20th century--better than those poseurs the Beatles, the Beach Boys and the Stones.

The show started at 8:00 the doors opened at 7:00; Geebee was waiting in line at 3:15. I use the word "line" metaphorically, as he was the only one there for about an hour; Geebee asked, somewhat bewildered, "Am I the biggest Kinks fan in Portland?"

We got front and center seats.

I have previously pointed out that in written communications, and in arguments of any stripe, I have a very thick skin. It's difficult to insult me-about ideas. But this doesn't extend into all areas of my life. Being a twentieth century woman, my, let us delicately say--unconventional--looks have always been a source of great insecurity, and getting older, greyer, and chubbier hasn't helped any.

Cue Ray Davies. I'm front and center. He gets on stage, settles down. The stage lights light up the first couple of rows. He says "Hello Portland." "You're (looking and pointing right at me, not that far away) looking good." He then smiles. At me. Happy Birthday to me. Thanks, Ray.

Oh, and he (and his Irish attack-guitarist) sounded great.



The Kinks, Waterloo Sunset sung by Elliott Smith.


Due to popular request, here's the actual Kinks, "Lola," based on a "Great War" song about an eponymous girl of easy virtue "with a shape like a bottle of coca-cola."

Nietzsche updated for the new century.

Can I has Superman?

And with this I say a fond farewell to my LOLcats period.

'Cause i haven't posted any riot grrrls for awhile

(fan video--has the original recorded track, listen for the song, what? You still think it sounds like it was recorded in a well? Quityerbitchin'.)


Actual Bikini Kill in concert--sound quality somewhat less? more? than horrific, but still awesome. Which reminds me, dear readers, any adjectives, hmmm?

That girl she thinks she's the queen of the neighborhood.
she's got the hottest trike in town.

Rebel Girl.

When she talks, I hear the revolution,

I think I want to take you home
I want to try on your clothes.

Kathleen Hanna in all her Bikini Kill Glory.


The rather absurdly emo boy (6 4 155 lbs, low cut girls jeans too small tshirt black rooster hair) at the local video store played this song once. He's not there anymore. I still mourn his passing.

Ps. I consider this a cure for, uh,

Barbie? Pop culture in its various forms? Though for the full vaccination, the Ramones should also be involved.

Another two of my favorite flavors -- Son House and the White Stripes

"Death Letter" + a bit of "Don't you mind people grinnin' in your face." Can someone please supply me with one or more adjectives for "awesome?" It would be much appreciated.

Oh, and Meg White totally rocks, or hits things with sticks, or something not quite so unintelligible. Son House, if I may be so disrespectful, would be pleased, I suspect.

All hail our youtube masters. We bow in your general direction. Plus, should anyone ask, the maximum air speed velocity of a common swallow is 45 mph.