Thursday, October 2, 2008

Fruit Fly Fallout After Nuking Incident


Maybe the bad Karma doesn't wait for the next life.

Perhaps people will think that I deserve whatever I get for being so uncaring in my efforts to purge my kitchen of fruit flies. But when I opted for the microwave, remember, I was defending my home. I looked around my kitchen, desperate for a non-toxic way of keeping those inscrutable invaders away (dead).
Is nuking them in the microwave so much crueler than spraying them with a deadly neuro-toxin (like Hitler), or leaving them to starve on a sticky strip (like Pol Pot)? Aren't those other traps really just a way of pretending you are not killing them, but (like Milosevic) just relocating them------into the trap? And isn't keeping a clean kitchen just yet another way of starving them slowly to death (like Stalin)?

And hey, I never actually chased them around with the brulee torch; I was just brainstorming. And I DID feed them in the microwave.

In any event, whether it's my husband's Jewish background with his attendant aversion for using ovens for the disposal of unwanted populations, or his longstanding vegetarian leanings, my husband is appalled. Furthermore, he is now unwilling to eat anything from the microwave, even though I cleaned it thoroughly.

So what I need now is a way to 'ritually cleanse' the microwave after it's misuse.......sigh.

Heck, maybe I'll just leave the critters alone. After all, now that I see that they read more newspapers than Sarah Palin, I have a new found respect for them. In fact, I think I'll treat them to some wine.

15 comments:

BillLee said...

smudging for cleansing:
http://ambrosiasrealms.tripod.com/cleansing.htm

djinn said...

I suggest burying the microwave in the back yard.

djinn said...

Oh, and in my experience, the fruit flies like a nice grapey red.

kerfuffler said...

I'm too lazy for the whole burial thing. It would take a huge hole to accommodate our old microwave. Maybe I could toss it in a mikveh-----a ritual cleansing bath.

If hubby is nice, I might even unplug it first.

kerfuffler said...

As for the fruit flies, I have it on good authority that they enjoy a bit of the bubbly------not champagne, mind you, but wine with a splash of dish detergent.

hubby said...

Just for the record, no religious concern here...just squeamishness. I think it's gross!

And yes, even after it's been sterilized. I am not alone. Check out this article . A quote:

"Loads of experiments have been done on disgust and contamination--people won't drink orange juice that has been stirred with a comb, even if they saw the comb being removed from its packaging; they won't drink or eat out of new, sterile bedpans; they won't eat food from a jar marked "Poison" even when they know perfectly well it's not poison; they often won't even eat from a container marked "NOT Poison," because of the sheer contaminative power of the word "poison."

kerfuffler said...

Looks like I'm gonna get me a NEW microwave. Woot! What else can I make ritually impure around here?

djinn said...

Knives. Mine are always going dull, and so expensive to replace. Good for squishing things, too.

kerfuffler said...

Great for dealing with blind mice too!

What? I can't use these knives anymore either?

Steve said...

Ewwww, yeah, that microwave doesn't seem very kosher right now! haha. In a related story, my parents once found a dead mouse in the crumb bin in their toaster. We couldn't figure out if anyone had used it while it was there and they still used it after cleaning it!

kerfuffler said...

I bet they lived through the great depression, and aren't about to let a little thing like a gag reflex make them be 'wasteful'(my mom's favorite word!).
Our generation is so spoiled. But hey, maybe the next decade will toughen us up.

djinn said...

My darling daughter Apricot called from college yesterday, telling me that her apartment (her first ever apartment) has mice. She also has a cat. Well, theoretically. Harold might show the mice comfortable spots to lounge or advanced shedding techniques, but is a complete bust as a mouse-removal system.

Anyway, back to the story. She asked: "Do I have to trap them, because then I would have DEAD MICE." What would happen if I just let them live? I told her it would be fine, as long as things didn't go completely awry, and she kept all her food (and Harolds food) carefully sealed. They can keep Harold company when he's home alone. Are there mouse probs? House mice and humans have coexisted pretty much since there have been houses.

kerfuffler said...

Mice do spread diseases, and they poop in your cupboards. Some things are not easily kept from mice. They LOVE corn chips (Tostitos?) and will nibble holes in brand new bags. Chocolate also drives them wild.

You can buy live traps. Drive FAR away to release your captives, and always transfer them to a suitable container before driving. Or buy a snake.

kerfuffler said...

Advanced shedding techniques....heehee!

kerfuffler said...

Oh, I just remembered! I saw an ad for an electronic doo-hicky that repels mice and other critters (cockroaches?) by emitting a frequency they can't stand.

In a building with other, possibly messy tenants, this is the way to go!
No mess, no driving, and no snakes. You just plug it in like an air freshener.