This faux documentary is for you! Enjoy.
Humor aside, for anyone who is interested, this video has some information backwards. LSD (and peyote) both seem to lead spiders to produce unusually flawless webs.
Surprisingly, caffeine incapacitates them completely------they just make jagged, random stands. I read about this years ago in a book from the Time-Life Science series. I no longer have the book, but I found these images online.