Billlee in the comments suggested that international disputes should be settled by interpretive dance. I think that there's an existing program that would work even better. A sing-off! All we have to do is expand the Eurovision song contest to include a few more states and raise the stakes just a tiny bit.
The Eurovision Song Contest (French: Concours Eurovision de la Chanson) is an annual competition held among active member countries of the European Broadcasting Union (EBU)....The Contest has been broadcast every year since its inauguration in 1956 and is one of the longest-running television programmes in the world. It is also one of the most-watched non-sporting events in the world.
So, for example, with the oil laws now being negotiated in Iraq between the Gov't and, uh, us (read various oil companies) we just have the main parties (Iraq and the oil companies) have a sing-off! Spangly costumes and back-up dancers required.
The pic's of Lordi, last year's winner. From Finland.
Here's the French entry from last year, just to get us all in the appropriate mood. As a bonus question (prize to be determined later) what animal does the bald lead singer have sewn onto his shoulder? A weasel, perhaps?